Quora – the promised land that wasn’t

Let’s file this misadventure under “limitations of Quora”, shall we? Also known as how my attempt to answer the question of “Do many Asian people have an inferiority complex against white people? If so, why?” and how it resulted in being told that:

  • it would be a huge mistake to assume every negative thing happens because of a person’s race (in response to my concrete examples of things I have experienced)… the more you act inferior because of negative thoughts from your own making or from douchebag comments the more likely you to actually become inferior.
  • I have never ever seen any form of racism in my life. What exactly are the types of racism you go through on a daily basis or even just any scenarios during your life? (when my entire response was completely based on things that had happened to me and seriously? Syria ring any bells? the current political rhetoric of the US? the whole mess in Europe right now with refugees?)

and this particular gem:

Though I do think these scenarios are exaggerated, they are most likely not intentional as I think you are a victim of your own mind. It seems as if this is how you feel they see you, not necessarily how they actually see you. The reason I say this is because English is your first language and you are a Chinese-American so you obviously do not have a Chinese accent, and people are telling you that your English is good? Come on, this just sounds like the perfect caricature of the typical American you would hear from someone who has never been there. People are assuming that you are “demure/coy/geisha-lady”? As if that many Americans actually know what the means.

I am not sure of your intentions, but I feel that you are over-analyzing all of this as a victim. This is just over sensitivity. The other day I listened to an African-American woman assume that the reason the woman at the grocery store checkout didn’t smile back at her was because she was racist. As if that is the only logical reason. Lighten up, and you will realize that white people aren’t as bigoted as the liberal media in America likes to portray.

Bingo! Can I have my prize please?

Oh wait, it’s a box of chococrazy with white privilege marshmallows? I think I’ll pass.

It never fails to amuse and astound me to witness the many ways people can contort themselves trying to get around the concept of racism.

I do think these scenarios are exaggerated – should I be grateful, good sir, that you think something might have happened, just not what I think actually happened? Because, you know, the words I heard could have been completely mis-interpreted by me. Words like “you so lucky, sucky sucky for five dolla”. Words like “There is the most adorable older Chinese couple sitting across from me on the T. They are the WASP-y-est thing ever. Him: Navy blazer, blue striped button down, khakis. her: think Elizabeth Warren but Chinese.”

This latter bit prompted a two hour conversation on why it was so “adorable” to see Chinese people dressing up like white people and how her choice of words was racist. (an entire thesis could be written on this conversation, involving the concepts of “old money” and “styles of wealth and “most people of that age who are Asian and have wealth are nouveau riche and look it” and “I’ve never seen anyone not white dress like that” and ultimately devolving into the mention of “wiggers”.)

*sigh*

…they are most likely not intentional – let’s talk about how the very fact that someone can say hurtful and and terrible things without intending to, with no thought to it is the every epitome of white privilege and and is in of itself racist.

…I think you are a victim of your own mind – no, I am not a victim of anything, not even racism. I do not define myself as a victim. Yes, bad things have happened to me, through design or not, but that is not how I define myself. The connotation of victim is that it is an absolute and that is absolutely not the be  all and end all of me. But for the purposes of your usage – no, I’m still not. This isn’t only in my head. If you cared to read any of the ten million articles available on the internet, you would see that it is a thing. But I suppose you would just like to call it mass delusion and over-sensitivity from a people who lack “maturity”, “originality” and “responsibility”.

Come on, this just sounds like the perfect caricature of the typical American you would hear from someone who has never been there. – It sounds like a caricature, yes? Unfortunately, I’ve lived in the US for most of my life and I can tell you that all of these things have happened before, multiple times. And did you just imply that I have no idea what I’m talking about because I’m not American/don’t live there? Dude, that’s racist.

People are assuming that you are “demure/coy/geisha-lady”? As if that many Americans actually know what that means. – You’re trying to erase something I’m trying to tell you by brushing it off. That’s racist. Fact: I have been spoken about with reference to geishas before. Fact: enough Americans know enough from movies like Memoirs of a Geisha to be unintelligent about it.

…you’re over-analyzing. That’s just over sensitivity.  Lighten up, and you will realize that white people aren’t as bigoted as the liberal media in America likes to portray. – and you, sir, are racist. Furthermore, I don’t believe you have actually read anything I said with an eye towards understanding. None of what I have said has come from liberal media. Not one thing. It’s all been personal experience. In fact, you are going on my list of examples of racism for erasure and gaslighting. Thank you for making my point for me.

I’m not sure how much more I’ll use Quora in the future. If I do, there might have to involve copious linking or copy pasta of my essays here.

I feel like Quora could have been a great instrument of good, a platform where the average person could ask experts things like “is it actually realistic that a virus engineered to kill only women actually succeeds in wiping out all women on a planet?” and get answers.

What I actually see is a lot people using it because they can’t be arsed to do a cursory search, using Quora as an IT help desk, or they’re trying to get people to perform emotional labor for them on the same damn questions “there’s this girl I like who friendzoned me what should I do” ad nauseum.

Short answer: guys, you need to learn to trust women. You may say you do, but you don’t.

 

 

2 Responses to “Quora – the promised land that wasn’t”

  1. thene

    GET OFF QUORA AND NEVER GO BACK.

    It wasn’t meant to be an instrument of good, it was meant to be a business opportunity in which someone made money by getting you to perform emotional labour for guys who ask “there’s this girl I like who friendzoned me what should I do” ad nauseum. literally ad nauseum, whenever someone asks that damn question again, that’s another batch of ad impressions or whatevs. I only hope everyone gets off quora so it burn and dies.

  2. kyrias

    Have I mentioned today that I love you yet? Because I do…
    That bit about the ad impressions made me LOL.

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